A man who left work at 34 says his most ‘complicated’ lesson came in year 3 of early retirement: just say ‘no’

Courtesy of the Mad Fientist.

Brandon, aka the "Mad Fientist," is a former software developer who achieved financial independence and early retirement at age 34.
He recently dedicated an episode of his podcast to sharing what he’s learned during his "third year of freedom."
One of the biggest lessons for him was learning to turn down opportunities that don’t align with his goals, even if they may be lucrative or just plain fun.
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There’s still a lot to learn when you leave the corporate world decades before most people. For Brandon, aka the "Mad Fientist," one of the biggest lessons cropped up a few years into early retirement.

Brandon saved 70% of his after-tax income while living in rural Vermont and then Edinburgh, Scotland, and reached financial independence by age 34. He then left his job as a software developer to spend more time traveling, with friends and family, and working on hobbies.

Brandon recently reflected on this "third year of freedom" during an episode of his podcast, the Mad Fientist.

"My problem with my first year after leaving my job was that I just said ‘yes’ to a lot of commitments, for the Mad Fientist in particular, but for other things, I would just say ‘yes’ to a lot of things … I was like, ‘why not’ because I have the time," Brandon said. "But by the end of the year, I realized I didn’t make any progress on the projects that are really important to me."

In his second year of early retirement, Brandon said "yes to a lot of fun stuff," but ultimately found that wasn’t fulfilling either.

"It’s like, it is so easy just to say ‘yes’ to things," he said. "So you need to constantly be asking yourself why and think about why you would do something and what the benefits are and weigh it up against the costs, because it’s really easy for your whole year to just be taken up with things and then you actually don’t do the things that you really want to do."

With that in mind, Brandon started turning down more offers than ever in order to make progress on his own projects. His decision to spend more time on meaningful tasks that further his goals has already ended up yielding "more lasting, deep happiness" than taking a fun trip or speaking at a conference would, he said.

"It’s surprising how complicated it’s been and how you always have to keep that in focus," Brandon said. "But I feel like this year has been the year that I’ve actually got to grips with it and have started making some really good decisions that have resulted in a really fun and productive year."

But, said Brandon, it’s tough to say no to those big opportunities that make you feel like a star, like being a keynote speaker at a conference or special guest on a radio or TV show. In fact, Brandon said his instinct is usually to say yes to those opportunities, so he always pauses to consider the true value of an offer before accepting.

"Go back to the example of being a keynote speaker at a conference," he said. "At first, my ego was like, ‘Yes, of course you want to be on stage, you want to be loved by everyone, you want to be well known and liked.’ … [But] once you really think about it, you realize that actually, that’s gonna take up a lot of time when I could be doing something else. And the benefits aren’t that great, because that’s not the life I want to live."

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